amazing women UNITE …

IMG_6313

Another amazing workshop with amazing women, check aaaand CHECK. Everything about it was magical and perfect. It started with a coyote siting on our drive into the park. Then, we found a jackrabbit hanging out in our meeting spot, keeping it warm and extra natury until we arrived. Then, at the tail end of our hike, we came over this little hill to a man playing guitar in the desert. And I haven’t even gotten to everything in between and after!!! So let me do that …

Jordan led us through a powerful body awareness walking meditation halfway through the hike. Afterward, we all paused for a moment and reflected on our physical and mental sensations. We all talked and caught up and got to know each other throughout the rest of the hike. Upon returning to our meeting place, we worked on a self love handout created by Jordan and I to dig a bit deeper into how we love ourselves. I was so grateful for everyone’s willingness to be open and to share bits of themselves, and to witness these bad ass ladies support each other. We all held space for one another. They created a safe space for me to guide them and not be scared doing so ;) And everyone created a safe judgement-free space to speak our truths, to be our authentic selves, to connect to something bigger than this physical world …

Jordan and I were so incredibly honored to guide these 4 beautiful, empowered and confident ladies. Wow. Just WOW.

Advertisements

[chain] link HEARTS …

I’ve been here in Phoenix for almost one month already. I KNOOOOOW, I can’t believe it eitheeeeer!

I’m opening up here. I take yoga regularly, and it feels different. It’s emotionally more challenging. In class today, the teacher had us holding poses longer, which helps to open the body and to feel what’s happening in there. And I had to come out of some of them sooner than the teacher guided us to. It was like my heart needed a break. I felt like I couldn’t keep going “there” … this was a beautifully interesting realization. My heart is more open here and therefore, yoga is proving more intense for me. I wanted to embrace this newfound openness, and so I came home and asked my friend, Jordan, for a hug. She’s a great warm and fuzzy hugger with lots of loving energy, so not surprisingly, tears started to well up in my eye balls. As us humans do, she asked what was wrong. “Nothing really.” I just needed some love and support cause being opened up is a tough place to be without love and support. As our hearts linked in that warm and fuzzy embrace, we could feel our hearts beating together (mine overpowering both 😉). Man, hugs are important. They literally link our heart energy and spread loads of love. I need to remember this more …

GREEN machine …

Green is the color of the heart chakra. Green is also the last name of my best friend. Coincidence? Hell no. [Insert a little fact about me: I don’t believe in coincidence.]

We have some mad crazy awesome synchronistic connection. The universe brought our beautiful souls together 10 or so years ago (she’d remember timing better then I). Although, the amount of time doesn’t matter anyway, as we were connected on this path long before we ever physically met at DPA Architects in Scottsdale, AZ. Oh, such fond memories …

Currently, we live on complete opposite sides of the country. We talk less now than we used to, yet our lives are more connected than ever. We seem to go through major life transitions around the same time. I left my NYC life around the same time a job in San Francisco came up for her (I left a big city, she moved to one!). The other night, we unintentionally journaled and contemplated the same topic: forgiveness. We’ve texted each other at the same exact time when we haven’t texted in days. We’ve sent each other things that are completely in line with something we are dealing with at that exact moment. This year, I sent her a birthday card with a green tea cup on it that said “Happy Birthday Best Tea” (adorable, I know). I had purchased it well in advance of her birthday, and just prior to me mailing it, she sent me a gift from her trip to Ireland: a pretty package of tea and a green tea cup. Yeah, that’s the kinda shit I’m talkin’ about.

For a while, we found this bizarre. Now, we are used to it and understand that this is our relationship. We are spiritually linked through the universe even while living thousands of miles away. It is really hard to put a relationship like this into words … if you’ve had one though, you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s so magical to have this type of connection with anyone, and I’m so incredibly grateful that it’s with her :)

I’d also like to add, as it is just as important, we get each others’ sense of humor! She makes me laugh. Like for real laugh. She can send me a 2-word text that’ll crack me up. And, we can hear each other’s tone and voices through text which makes our correspondence that much funnier. We just get each other. And not too many people get us ;) Which is why we work. And why it’s easy. And amazing.

What’s also amazing is this little story: Green and I traveled last August/September together, spending 4 days in Phoenix and then made our way to California for 6 days. Every day of that vacation, we were blessed with heart-shaped “things” along our path. “Things” refer to fried eggs, rock formations, artwork, latte art, a potato pancake, graffiti, etc. All hearts. Following us along our journey together. We knew they were signs and weren’t quite sure of the meaning yet, so we embraced it, laughed about it, shared it, loved it.

Now, I can see that those hearts were a sign of opening up. For both of us. Opening our hearts to others. To each other. And, most importantly, to ourselves. We both have been on quite the adventure this past year and a half. Learning to find ourselves again and to love ourselves more deeply then ever. And I know that we were meant to be on this spiritual ride together. And giiiirlfriend, this ride ain’t over, so get strapped in and remember I’m here to support you and love you through it all. You are my human heart chakra … those are some big shoes to fill, huh?. No pressure. Just keep bein’ Green.

the CENTER of our world …

As my dear friend Nicole once said on one very memorable drunken ladies night, “it’s all about the heart.”

I dreamt about this image last night: my hand swirled around and around in circles, over and over again in my dream. Around a tiny heart. Sometimes the heart was red and sometimes black. The image stuck with me until I rose this morning and I knew that I had to draw it … or paint it, as I did here. I had a manageable list of things to get done today … none of which I could accomplish until I put this image on paper. Over a year ago, I bought myself 2 bamboo brushes and sumi ink in order to paint some things just like this. I had never used those brushes until today. My subconscious told me it was time.

To me, this image screams: heart center. You’re like duh, Dawn, of course it does. Shush and keep reading. Everything about our existence as humans starts (and ends, I suppose) at our heart center. So many of us have forgotten that. Forgotten what that feels like. Forgotten how to do that. Forgotten how damn important this is to every single aspect of our being. And I’m one of them. I needed my subconscious dream state to remind me of this. And my conscious awareness reminds me often as well … as long as I remember ;) Seriously, this shit is not easy. I have spent many years closing up and “protecting” (this idea many of us have created for ourselves is BS though, as the more we protect it, the more pain we experience) my heart to the point where I couldn’t even feel it’s beat anymore. Talk about building a wall.

So, now what? I want to open my heart. I want to love the shit out of myself. We all have our own ways of doing this (and a whole lot of ways to ignore doing this). Some of my ways  of opening are yoga and meditation and creating relationships with like-minded people and becoming a Health Coach and breathing into my heart space and trying to maintain good posture to shine my heart forward into the world (aside from right now as I type slumped over on my bed) and sharing my true self to the people around me (like writing this post, in case you hadn’t picked up on that).  My life experiences have made loving me harder and harder to do. However, those are all stories created by me … and edited by me … and re-written by me … many pages of fiction about what other people thought I should be, or what society deemed appropriate at any given time, or what my SAT scores meant for my future success, or that I had to look a certain way to get dates with guys or even to find friends. None of these things really have anything to do with me – with the heart and soul that lives inside this amazing body of mine (and by amazing, I mean fascinating, not sexy, but let’s be honest people, my body is pretty sexy too). I went along with it all because I knew no better. And thank goodness I did, cause it got me here. I am an amazing person capable of loving and feeling and being every bit the soul I was brought into this world to be. I’d say it’s about time I let that shit shine!!!

This is what Health Coaching is for me. It is my place to shine, to support people in their journey to this magical place within themselves. Cause we all have it. It may just need a little, or a lot, of massaging to release it. Remind yourself of how amazing you are and of the gifts you are here to offer the world. And then remind yourself again and again. Your heart will catch on. I promise. 

And, I heart you. <3

see the LOVE …

HEART CHAKRA : center of chest : loooooove

*I honestly have no idea if these 2 fellas are lovers … it just worked out that they were walking together below the heart in the rock so it’s like double-love!

emotional CONNECTION to illness is for REAL …

 I’ve had a cold for the past few days so the only thing I’ve created is a giant pile of dirty tissues. My sickness came about as I was creating a negative environment within my body, full of old feelings of anger, hurt and frustration toward a person close to me, which then changes to anger, hurt and frustration toward myself for allowing this negativity to “control” me for so long. This is not the first time I have made myself sick in this way, so I’m quite aware of what I created here. I just hadn’t realized it soon enough before fucking with my immune system. So, here I am, NOW … and I need to either accept and move past the past or I need to talk to this person about working toward a healthier relationship. I’m going with option 2 which is super difficult, but I’m ready. It can only make me stronger, our relationship stronger and make this easier for me to do in future loving relationships. I want to be more open and vulnerable and stop being so guarded. I know this guardedness is holding me back from being my true self and the creative genius I really know I’m capable of being. If you read my post yesterday, you read about the connection I made between an open heart and creativity. I want that. Always. And forever. And ever.

how does your heART feel today ?

hearts

This drawing was speaking to me today, so I just had to share it with you (in lieu of Elements REintroduction, but don’t worry as they’ll be here tomorrow!).

I’ve had some HEARTy changes in my life this week and have been working on some serious self-lovin’ for the past few weeks. I assume I am not alone in this, so pick out the heart that resonates with you the most at this very moment! xoxoxo